Alice in birthstory-land

Friday- wiped pink all day. Chris worked from home so I could take kids to co-op(one car family- since his car is still in Seattle)
Saturday- went to the zoo. a few strong contractions. Went to bed irritable and impatient.
Sunday- woke at about 5:30 am breathing through a ctx. Set my sleep timer for 53 minutes and started some youtube rain and thunder soundtrack.
Had about 5 ctx before rain cut off.
Woke up and made breakfast- nothing.
Monday- wiping blood and mucous. My cervix felt so different today. Ctx were strong but irregular.
Erin came over with Sean and we went for a walk to try a regulate the contractions. Just outside the neighborhood a tree company was clearing some big trees. I was telling Chris just last night how I wanted a wooden hand carved advent wreath and I figured the best place to start was with a cross section of a high tree. I asked the foreman and he cut a big 1.5 inch thick slice of a 12 inch limb himself. We took the chunk of wood home and continued on UR walk. I had a few strong ones but none too regular.
Chris came home. We went to Kroger after dinner(moe's Monday!) loading up on easy food options for the kids and walking. I had to lean on refrigerated cases during contractions and they felt more regular. We came home and just being around the kids made the contractions go away. I checked myself- 5-6cm with a soft low neck. Chris put a movie on for the kids and suggested another walk- to get out. I changed into less frumpy clothes and we walked to Atkins park tavern for an appetizer and a drink. A few more strong irregular ctx. We took the long route there and I kept having to slow him down until We were standing during a contraction.
Came home and went to bed.
I woke at 3:30 with a ctx.
Laid in bed listening to the awful weather for another hour or so having a few strong contractions that felt more regular.
Woke up and checked myself - 6 cm, no neck, stretchy and WAY posterior- I had real trouble trying to even reach it.
Finally got up and started packing for hospital. I figured I didn't want the kids to kill the contractions when they woke this morning. And I didn't want to have to navigate traffic AND the morning rush en route to hospital. Stalling was a real possibility at the hospital since I was just 5 -6 cm and so I decided maybe we should go to tech as a neutral laboring ground.
So we headed there around 5:00.
We got there around 5:30 and the bottom doors were open, welcoming us in from the bitter cold.
I went to the bathroom and had a couple ctx on the toilet.
It was so comfortable on the toilet and there was entertaining literature about hell week and hate week and whatnot. I felt like I was in the book 1984.
I went back out to the common area- couches, big screen tv, tables, shelves and laid down on a couch.
I told Chris we could just hang out here and not have to wake fr Kevin up.
He said "he's your brother. He won't be upset at being woken up."
So I called him.
I told him we were downstairs and he said "com'on up!"
So we boarded the elevator.
I went straight into the bathroom when we got there and stayed there pretty much the whole time.
I came out for a second for a glass of water and noticed fkp had made Chris a cup of coffee. I was grateful. Tech was a good idea. It provided me a neutral space.
There came a time when I looked around myself at the guest bathroom and I felt this urge to stay there forever. I knew then that it was time to go- that if we stayed even five more minutes it would be too late to move me.
In the wintery rain we headed across 85 to the hospital. I think I only had one ctx on the way. He dropped me off under the big covered entry area.
At this point I had a flashback to johns labor and delivery. I decided to walk up the stairs quickly because I knew the physical activity would bring on a contraction. I made it inside and to the same bench across from the welcome desk that I sat on during johns labor. I had a contraction there and then made it to the elevator bay and up.
My contractions slowed during check in but once in the room I hid in the bathroom until I had felt they were back on track. I believe it was about 7:20.
At this point I think we called mom to catch her before going to mass. I wanted her to head over to the house from morning mass and stay with the kids. She didn't have to rush because they wake around 10(lazy you say? Oh no- they are getting prepared, like scouts, for pacific time zone living!)
The nurse belted the monitors on and said they wanted me on for 20 minutes. I longed for warm water to envelope me and I saw the monitors as the key. Once I had a 20 minute strip I was to be allowed access to a birthing tub. After a 20 minute strip the midwife and midwife in training (MIT)came in. The midwife let the MIT check me first. I told her "I'm way posterior."
And she said "not anymore."
After she checked me the midwife checked me and they compared notes.
The MIT said "5 cm?"
And I felt so incredulous. I was 5 cm at home. At tech I had some cervix shattering contractions and had a great deal of blood to show my cervix was progressing. At the same time I had doubt- man, I should have checked myself at tech.
Then the midwife said "I got 8"
Yeah- that's more what I expected.
Then we sat and talked about how my cervix was like a rubber band that when you try and get a read it just stretches this way and that and the diameter is changing all over the place.
I also told the midwife that I felt more cervical changes when I contracted standing straight up but my body wanted to lean over to defray the pain. She said "yes- that sounds exactly right."
So I kind of took turns standing straight and leaning every other contraction. And then also sitting on the potty. During the contractions I had by the bed the nurse asked all of her intake questions. She asked "you have had 10 pregnancies including this one, 8 deliveries, but only 7 living children?"
Seriously? I have to explain this now?
After registration fun with the nurse I turned on pandora and switched to "over the Rhine" radio. I needed to drown out the tactless presence of her. She tried to place a hep lock on me during a contraction and had the needle in my arm fishing around for the vein when the MIT came in and saw me trying to cope. MIT said "I spoke with Gloria- she said she won't need an iv". The nurse stopped her fishing and I mouthed "thank you" to MIT and finished the contraction in a more comfortable position.
Sadly, I eventually had to get the hep lock.
I analyzed the strip and realized 24 minutes had elapsed so I took it off. Chris urged me to be compliant. I told him I had to go to the bathroom.
I proceeded to hide in the bathroom for the next three contractions.
Back by the bed I asked the midwife when I could have a tub. She said that they weren't happy with the baby's heart rate during contractions. That the baby was dipping too low for her comfort. I played with positions and the baby seemed to not like the leaning pain defraying position at all.
When everyone was gone from the room and Chris and I had a moment of privacy I told him I didn't want to do this. I was standing on the door side of the bed near the monitors so I could track the heartrate. He was sitting backed against the far side of the room with the large window behind him. Night was receding but the Atlanta city scape was still cloaked in a fog so thick you couldn't call it a "sunrise".
I felt myself holding the baby back and up.
"I don't want to do this. This part hurts."
I can't remember his response.
I just remember the feeling of standing at a crossroads. Let the baby down- I told myself. The heartrate- I reminded myself.
Oh, but the pain- I recalled. It will be over soon.
The next contraction started regular and got grunty fast. The nurse urged me not to push until she fetched the midwife. I rolled my eyes at Chris.
I got onto the bed- I knew this stage would make my legs shake and get super weak. I knelt and leaned over the back of the inclined head of the bed. During a contraction I got a fierce CRAMP in my right hamstring. (All cpas because the cramp was screaming at me). I was so vocal during that contraction I think the nurses were worried the baby was coming NOW! After the contraction ebbed and I could form words I sad "cramp. Right ham" Chris put his warm warm right hand on my leg and said "right here?" It melted immediately. I put the head of the bed down a bit and flipped(not as fast as it sounds-imagine a whale flipping over while it is beached) and stretched out my hamstring. I think it was about 8:30 at this point.
The midwife and MIT came in.
I don't recall being checked.
I do recall asking for stirrups.
I wanted someone to hold my legs and I didn't want that someone to be me OR a tiny wispy nurse that I could blow across the room.
The pushing contractions slowed down to one every 10 minutes or so.
this, I think, is when the music started really getting appropriate.
Adele sang "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead" and I heard the "hurts instead" part and laughed.
Karen berquist sang "Sleep with one ear close to the ground
And wake up screaming" which is Sam and my favorite OTR song. It made me think of her- such a great big sister.
At my side stood nurse named Jin. She put two fingers firmly on my fundus- she announced that there was a contraction coming- no news to me. So next contraction when she begins to do the same I just took her hand and removed it. I think she got the picture.
I began to cry. I just felt overwhelmed. I cried for a lot of reasons. But I couldn't help but remember Jedidiah's pushing stage. How protracted the breaks between contractions were- like this one.
And I recalled the heartrate. I asked about it. Gloria said "the baby seems to like this position".
I decided enough was enough. During the next contraction I will start pushing and stop pretending.
So I did. I pushed. I curled my body around that baby inside me and pushed. My chin kept creeping up and my voice did too. But I brought them both back down.
The contraction subsided. My legs shook with extreme shock. There were monumental changes happening to my body. I asked myself "why doesn't this get any easier???"
On pandora Ingrid Michaelson was singing "But all that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now, now now now"
And I took a deep breath and waited for the contraction that would welcome another life into this world.
It came and I pushed with a screaming ferocity. I felt a pop. Water. Then another push and another pop. Head. And then another push and a squiggling deep inside wriggled as it came.
The MIT said "here he is!"
And a nurse said "it's a girl!"
And the midwife said "they don't know."
My head lay on the inclined bed and facing up. I was too exhausted to move. But we had a boy! Or a girl! I felt them help the baby onto my stomach. They covered us with blankets.
When I felt more composed I lifted my head off the pillow and Chris and I peeled the blankets back. A girl!
I felt like she looked like John but with dark hair.

Alice Marian
8lb7oz
21 inches
11/26/13
9:02





Peace,
Elizabeth,

Sent from my rotary phone