Tuesday, November 29, 2011
john cornelius' wild ride- a birth story
Friday was Jedidiah’s feast day. The whole week prior I was having signs of early labor. So at 10 o’clock Friday night I sat back into the couch and heaved a sigh of relief. I did NOT want to be in or near a hospital on the anniversary of Jedidiah’s death. I felt a huge curtain lift. I told God I was ready to meet this baby growing inside me.
Saturday 1am I lost my mucus plug. It’s only happened once before that I can recall and I was in labor at the hospital with Max. I googled and found out it’s just another one of those signs that “labor could be hours, days, or weeks away” - ugh. I tried to tell my body- “pay no mind”. But bodies don’t listen sometimes. Or maybe they do? Anyway the “practice” contractions changed then. They had changed the week prior too. It was like a gradual stepping up. First they were Braxton-hicks, then they were back cramping Braxton-hicks. Saturday began the “cervixy” back-cramping Braxton hicks. They were enough to cause me some distraction. They continued and caused me to wake up through the night- no more sleeping through contractions. And of course that caused me to wonder “is this it?" Some women say, ‘if you can’t sleep through contractions then you are in labor’.”
Sunday Since we went to Saturday night vigil we decided to take Sunday easy. I did get out to Denise’s house to have Christina work on my left round ligament. It was giving me some pain during contractions. She loosened it up and I felt relief immediately. I had gotten used to walking around with it being tight but I worried that it would encourage a less than optimal prenatal position.
The rest of that Sunday went just as the days prior. Days were peppered with attempts at trying to encourage the contractions, and my nights were filled with tricks at trying to discourage them.
Chris kind of liked the side-effect of these night waking contractions. “The bathroom is clean, the laundry is done”. I would switch laundry during each waking or spend 5 minutes tidying up an area before returning to bed to toss and turn what had become my large pregnant body until I was comfortable.
Monday I checked my cervix and I felt what likely was “effacement”. It no longer felt like a rubber coke bottle- but more of a flatter opening. I was going to lay down for a nap but I told the kids “if we walk to the park I’ll have the baby tonight”. They all got their bikes ready. I put Frankie in the stroller with a couple bottles of water and we headed out. It was kind of mucky because of all the rain we had gotten. Mud and fallen leaves covered the path. I had only a few contractions walking to and from the park. Mostly I just felt side-stitches.
Of course that night the kids looked at me expectantly.
“Ummm, mom? You said….”
“Well, maybe tomorrow.”
Going to bed I had a few good contractions but looking at the clock told me they weren’t coming in a pattern good enough to do anything.
Tuesday At about 2 am I woke to a real contraction. It caused me to breathe nice deep and slow. I really was quite exhausted so I got up and went downstairs for some wine, magnesium, and a little hulu. I downed a glass of red wine and 2 magnesium pills. I watched a little of an episode of “house” before I decided I’d go give sleep a try. It was beautiful. Contractions kept coming irregularly but they didn’t keep me awake. I’d feel them- breathe deeply through them- but they never got me anxious. I’d go right back to deep sleep- just what I needed.
In the morning I watched Chris sleep and debated telling him. I thought “surely these contractions will pick up once I’m up on my feet and about my day”. I decided not to tell him and let him go in to work- about an hour’s drive away. It ended up being a good choice. It turned out not to be as I thought. Being up and about and handling the kids’ needs slowed the contractions a good deal. And when we began to school at the table- Saxon math effectively killed them cold. It was beautiful outside. My friend Laura suggested a walk. So after math the kids and I walked to the neighborhood park (a lot shorter a walk compared to yesterday’s “labor inducing” park walk). We returned home to lunch and a nap. Once I had the little girls asleep (and Samantha creatively filling a journal at the kitchen table) I sent the boys over to their friend’s house to play with star wars Legos. I took a short nap. Contractions returned. Irregular but strong. They felt really lower-back-ish and rocking my hips forward and back and especially tucking my sacrum forward helped take that pain away. I got up and finished some laundry. More contractions. I decided to check on my cervix. It was so different and completely foreign to me! It felt like a street with a manhole cover missing- and in the opening of the manhole I felt what could be described as one of those red “simple” buttons on the staples commercials. And when I pressed it in, I could feel the baby’s head. When I took my fingers out I looked at them and it was about 2 inches between them. I texted Chris telling him that I was 4-5 and maybe he should come home. Thinking about his long commute and the possibility of driving in labor during rush hour got me a little worried. But I still wasn’t sure this was it.
My friend Michelle (dolphin’s godmother) called and while on the phone with her the contractions seemed to get curiously more regular. I had to put the phone down to breathe through a few and sitting on the toilet’s open seat during the contraction’s peak felt nice. The girls woke up and I decided I’d start a movie for them, put the chicken in the oven (I think at this point it was only 4PM?), and take a bath- which is what I did. In the bath I had a few hard contractions. One contraction gripped me so hard I was wishing the bath had been lined with thick neoprene- it was SO hard a surface to sit on! My butt wanted cushion or an open seat like the toilet! Chris came upstairs and checked on me. He refilled my water and let me know he’d be downstairs if I needed him. I stayed in the bath for a few more contractions- trying to find a comfortable space. I ended up getting out and going back to the toilet. While on the toilet I checked my cervix again. I think my heart flipped a bit when I couldn’t find the sides. It was so open I had to feel twice to see if what I was feeling was surely what I was feeling. Chris must’ve heard me get out so he came up to check on me. He came into the bathroom as I held up my fingers.
“How many centimeters is this?” It looked to me to be about 3 inches. What was that conversion again?
“Big. We need to go, NOW.”
He told me to get dressed while he took the girls to join the boys at Joyce’s house.
“There is chicken in the oven!!!” I yelled after him.
“It’s too late for that. I’ll give her money to order pizza.”
He was back quickly and started packing his bag before I had even figured out what to wear. He asked me if I wanted to pack mine. I remember making a face and thinking, do I have to? I didn’t want to go anywhere so I told him I wasn’t sure what to pack. I kind of threw a coming home outfit in for both “dolphin” and I and Chris zipped it up. I didn’t want to get dressed. I kept looking at my choices of clothes and thinking “hmm, now, what outfit should I wear so I am most comfortable birthing a baby in a car?” Pants simply would NOT do. I finally pulled on a summer dress.
My mind wrestled with itself. “What?! Stay home you fool! Or at least go to the nice shiny fancy hospital 6 miles away!”
“Well, what if I have a lot longer to labor? What if I get to that nice shiny hospital and I stall? Then I’m stuck on the turf of the intervention train, with no water birth at my disposal.”
“You think you are going to stall? You are WAY past stalling sister! You can’t even find your shoes without breathing through a contraction!”
Panic set in. Margaret called while I was standing in the kitchen getting my phone and purse together. I almost whined to her “I don’t think I’m going to make it!!!”
“Is your water broken?”
“No”
“Then you still may have some time”
She spoke so confidently and calmly I immediately calmed down. But in the background I could hear her getting things ready for her to leave and meet us down at the hospital- the one that isn’t 6 miles away.
“Ok. I can do this.” I told Chris. “Did you turn off the oven?”
“Yes. Let’s go!”
On the way I tried to call the midwives. All the choices that the automated person was giving me just served to frustrate me. I thought they were speaking in a circular language. After my second call I gave the phone to Chris and he immediately patched through to the answering service. He made it look so easy! When did he learn to decipher circles? As we headed south I was thankful that the contractions had spaced out. But I knew we had a long drive ahead of us and it was just now 5 o’ clock. As we accessed 85-south I noticed terrible storm clouds gathering over in the direction of downtown.
We had the sunroof opened but soon had to shut it because the rain picked up. Halfway down 85 the contractions really picked back up too. I unbuckled and turned to face backwards over the seat for a lot of them. I faced each contraction to the tune of the annoying “your belt is unbuckled!!!” alarm. My face would get really hot after each one so Chris had the heat and the cool air alternating at intervals. Between Beaver Ruin and the connector I kind of lost sense of time and place. I was so intensely focused on making the contractions ineffective. At some point inside the perimeter the rain became so thick I felt I had to keep my belt on and facing forward which was fine- turning backward in the car was nauseating. I wasn’t sure if the nausea was car-sickness or transition. I grabbed a towel from the back seat and held it in my lap. Chris was doing such a great job driving and keeping us safe. When we reached the connector I felt the baby make a downward movement and I rejected the whole motion. Out loud I said “no, don’t do that- stay up- Lord help this baby stay up.” Between contractions I told Chris to get off at the north avenue exit and take a left. When we passed the 10th, 14th, 17th street exit traffic came to a slow slow crawl.
“I should have gotten off at that exit”, Chris lamented.
He carefully pulled over into the emergency lane and we crawled a little faster. We got to the North Avenue exit and all the lanes going left were packed- and the overpass looked the same. I briefly entertained taking a right and heading to Georgia Tech to deliver. I must have been in irrational transition –land for that to be a viable option. The contractions on the North Ave exit ramp started to get really pushy and I felt my voice descending into grunts. Uh-oh. Keep it up- don’t go down. Don’t drop down. My mantra sounded like this. The surface streets with the bumping and the maneuvering made my contractions really pick up in intensity. I remembered something Margaret said on the phone before we left. Keep your breathing shallow. Pant pant pant . And during the peak of the contraction the skin of my lower abs and back felt as if they were on fire. The feeling was so new and curious.
We proceeded in the stop-and-go traffic getting stopped at what seemed like EVERY traffic light. At one point I said “boulevard should be the next light- take a right”. But it wasn’t.
“NOOOOO” I cried. “It’s the next one”. But it wasn’t. “UNGHHH!!!” Stay up! Stay up! Don’t go down yet!
We finally made our way into the drive through for the main entrance(Chris says that it was about 6:15). Thankfully there was a roof over our heads as we got out because the storm was still raging. I held onto the towel, grabbed my phone, and my pre-registration paper. Chris came around and helped me out of the car. I was having a contraction and didn’t want to move my hips so I kind of floated up the stairs hanging on his shoulder and walking on the very very tips of my toes. He floated me into the lobby and I found a not so thickly cushioned bench. I sat sideways while he asked for a wheelchair. The lady behind the information desk said very blankly would be 30 minutes.
“Call for one NOW!” he said. “Where is the ER?”
“Just through those doors.”
Chris pushed through the doors. I looked back at the car- we aren’t in the best part of town for a new model Honda to be left engine running, doors open. The lobby was relatively empty but for a few people. Some people were waiting and some people were walking through. It was all very anti-climactic and looking back it would have been fitting to have some elevator music playing. Chris came back through the doors with no wheelchair.
“What about the car?” I asked.
“Don’t worry about that.”
“Go park it- I’m fine” I said. I was between contractions- basking in the fake fluorescent light of a hospital- finally. I NEVER would have thought fluorescent lights would be so comforting.
While Chris was parking the car I spotted the elevators from my seat. I stood up and began walking quickly but not so quick as to cause a contraction toward the doors.
On my way past the desk I ask “what floor is L&D?”
“7”
“Thanks”
Providentially, an elevator was already open so I quickly made my way in and pressed 7.
As the doors closed I heard a male’s voice yell “we got a wheelchair!!!”
Too late buddy. And you BETTER not stop this elevator.
The elevator was quick- much quicker than the elevator that takes me to the midwives' office- and I was out on the 7th floor looking for signs to point me in some direction. I should have paid more attention during the tour! Where was the nurses’ station?!?!? I couldn’t find signs. Chris says there were signs but I don’t think my mind was working. The only signs I saw were in Spanish I think. I chose a direction and took two steps but the decision began to not feel right. Right then a contraction hit and I panicked. I could NOT remain standing. I put down my phone, the towel, and my registration papers and I got on hands and knees on the shiny linoleum white floor. A man sitting in the waiting room asked me if I needed help.
I nodded vigorously and my contraction tone turned to deep long grunts. “UNGHHHHH !!!! “ You can’t deliver in the elevator bay!!! You made it all this way!!! I thought. Nurses found me and helped me into the wheelchair. I scrambled for my pre-registration paper- I did NOT want to be questioned about insurance providers before this baby came out. In the wheelchair I couldn’t sit in it straight so I sat sideways on my left hip. As they pushed me one nurse asked “what baby is this for you, hon?”
“Eight”
The pushing got faster.
We got to a room. It wasn’t ready. We found another room that was supposedly ready and I was helped out of the chair.
“Do you want to wear your dress or this gown?”
Decisions decisions.
“Yes. NO!!!!!” I pulled off my dress, they threw on the gown.
“We need to get a strip so I’m going to put these belts on you.
I was on hands and knees in the bed saying “NOOOOO!!!”
They put on the belts and started the strip (records indicate that this happened at 6:33). Chris came in the room at this point. He was standing between the foot of the bed and the bathroom.
In the past he has started waiting in the waiting room during pushing. But I had no support- everyone in the room was a stranger. So I told him to come up by the head of the bed. He came over to me and stood by the head of the bed.
After another grunty contraction the nurse said “we need to check you to make sure this baby doesn’t come on his own”
Huh? “NOOOOO!!!” what did she say to me? How else is this baby going to come but on his own?
The midwife made it into the room. I had never had an appointment with her but I had talked on the phone with her before. She checked me and said “the baby is right there.”
Someone else said “we don’t have time to fill the pool”
I think my non-birthing sarcastic self would have said “no, really, I’ll wait- just let me cross my legs.” But instead, my birthing self said “UNGHHHH!!!” in sync with my next contraction. Baring down was answered with a POP! My water broke with such force it hit the underside of the sheet that was thrown on top of me with a hard “SPLASH!!!”
“Ah, that’s nice” I said- the relief was immediate. Immediate and VERY short lived.
Now for the baby.
I began to push. I never have been so vocal in any of my births. I screamed. I yelled. I looked at Chris and felt sorry that he had to see me in such anguish. His face. Ugh. His classic stoicism was there- but it was paper thin. I wanted to be through with pushing. I bared down but felt the “ring of fire”. I stopped pushing. I reminded myself of Ina Mae’s sphincter law. Relax your face and neck- loosen the edges of your mouth. I quickly loosened my mouth and blew out making the sound of a horse with my loose lips. The burning went away and I began to push again. My legs pushed straight- I needed some leverage, something to push against. The midwife was very hands off, which was nice. She did step in and say, “I need your leg over here to make room for the baby”
His head came out with the next contraction. And then half of his body. I asked “do you see his head?”
“He’s halfway out; I’m waiting on you to push the rest of him.”
The next push gave me this feeling that a long long baby just kept piling out. I kind of crawled backwards like a crab up to the head of the bed as he came out. The midwife put him low on my chest- the cord was short. He was glorious. Completely covered in lanugo- completely. Hair. Screaming. Warm. Long toes. Good lungs. The cord was long enough for him to reach my breast and I offered it. He didn’t immediately latch on but he seemed happy just being there.
The midwife called his birth at 6:45.
The room wasn’t ready for him. There were no blankets, towels, diapers. My midwife was a one-woman show. Between the birth and the placenta she was buzzing about the room setting things up. I’m pretty sure Margaret arrived before the afterbirth. She took my camera and began snapping pictures. These first pictures will be cherished!
I was still reeling. What chaos my body had been through over the last hour and a half. I’m sure if I wasn’t high on birth I could have heard my body screaming. The muscles in my butt and lower back were sure to be sore tomorrow- from just trying to hold the baby back and up. After the midwife showed me the tree of life formed by the vessels of the placenta she checked my perineum for tears. It was intact- a relief to be sure. She then gave me a shot of pitocin in my right thigh saying that since it was my 8th baby my uterus may need help getting back to regular size.
John’s godmother, Michelle(the one I spoke to on the phone seemingly hours and hours ago) showed up soon after Margaret. She battled traffic for TWO hours to get there. She got to hold him- he whom she had prayed for so long. I’m so thankful for her prayers and constant encouragement.
I wasn’t able to really eat the hospital snack bag. It was too sugary and the post-birth cramps were strong enough to irritate my stomach. My parents stopped by Outback Steakhouse on the way to the hospital and got Chris and I each a steak/potato/salad dinner. I took a Motrin and then inhaled my dinner. We hung out in the delivery room for a couple hours, waiting for the hospital to get me and john into their system. Once they loaded us up we were moved to the “mother/baby” floor for the rest of our stay.
Chris’ parents arrived as we were making the move and visited for a little while before heading north to pick up the kids from Joyce's house. I had texted her a picture and his name so she could show the kids- who were going to visit their newest baby brother the next morning.
When I met with the midwife 24 hours later she mentioned he was “sunny side up”. The birth position explains the back burning contractions. It explains how I was able to not have a baby in the car. It explains the prodromal labor.
john cornelius-
born 11/22/11
at 6:45 pm
weighing in at 8lb15oz (probably nine pounds at birth but he peed on me right before they weighed him)
20.5 inches (but he was 22 inches at margaret's office yesterday- pretty impressive if he grew an inch and a half in 6 days!)
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5 comments:
Praying for your family! Love the story.
Erika
Congratulations on your new son! God is so good! He is beautiful and I am so glad he arrived safely. I had my 6th baby in March and had a similar wild ride arriving at the ER door nine minutes before she was born. Labor has a whole new focus when you are asking are dear Lord to get you there in time instead of help you with the pain. Also, gotta love how those wheelchair rides get faster after you answer what number baby this is. God Bless You and your new addition.
Congratulations on your new son! God is so good! He is beautiful and I am so glad he arrived safely. I had my 6th baby in March and had a similar wild ride arriving at the ER door nine minutes before she was born. Labor has a whole new focus when you are asking are dear Lord to get you there in time instead of help you with the pain. Also, gotta love how those wheelchair rides get faster after you answer what number baby this is. God Bless You and your new addition.
Great Moro reflex on your little man, Elizabeth. He is so pink and strong!
Love it, really enjoy your stories...
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